Right now I am going to tell you that Halloween in Athens, OH is a gauche display. It is over-the-top in every way, and that is just the way we like it. This is my last year attending an Athens Halloween, and I would like to take a minute to reflect. I recently read an article/slideshow in the Huffington Post that makes jest with all the inappropriate costumes to wear. Writers Alex Leo and Katla McGlynn write "Just remember, no matter how bad you may feel about whatever you come up with, as long as you're not dressed in one of the costumes below, you're all set." The worst, truly "inappropriate" (by who's standards?) costume was probably the child dressed as a suicide bomber... but what I saw it I didn't feel offended so much as confused as to why a child would ever want to be that. Anyway, the rest of the costumes are pretty much crude penis jokes socially insensitive puns. To the Huffington Post I say: Just come to Ohio University.

Here we fly our crude costume flags proudly. It is the one time of the year our strait-laced Judeo-Christian society lets go of the politically correct and socially acceptable for a night. Men go out proudly dressed as women without fear of reprimand; college students proudly show off their sexuality, Any other day of the year a skirt so short would only gain looks of scorn, tonight girls will compliment each other on how cute they look as a school-teacher-by-day-hooker-by-night.

And so, I plan to revel in our most celebrated day of social aberration. But before I do, I would like to curse those that can't handle this amount of freedom from the norm, even for a night. For tips about how to stay safe this weekend, check out Amanda King's article. To her advice, I would add: Stay away from the horses. If you mess with them you can be charged with assaulting an officer. If you are wearing heels, bring flats. Who knows if you will be doing a lot of walking or if you get too drunk to walk in heels. Police will look for people that stand out from the crowd. If you are the person tripping a lot, odds are in your favor you may recieve more attention than you want.